Saturday, February 06, 2010

It Is Time To Call Out BS!!!!!

I am sitting here listening to yet another announcement from a leadership that just cannot seem to get its shit together. I have no other place to vent things out so if you have wondered over here it may not be as flowery as you may like, nor as poetic as I have been hoping this blog could be again. This is one of those times when hangin' my brain out to dry means that the drops will be carrying away some of the darker thoughts I have been carrying around.
I am so tired of church leadership!
I am also extremely tired of infantile congregations!
On the first point the main thing that wearies me to tears is the disease that seems to gnaw away at leader's minds until they no longer have the ability to look outside of their own calling, position, or gifting. It is unclear what this ailment should even be called, but it is clearly deadly. Part of the process of this malady is to produce a brain numbing pathogen that is emitted from the oral cavity, and after it enters the ears of nearby victims it nests at the base of the logic center until the flow of thoughts through this center are completely choked out. At this stage the victim becomes fully pliable to any further suggestions from the original host.
Leaders are constantly telling the folks out in the pews how we are supposed to be working out our issues with one another and walking in love with one another. We are challenged. We are reminded. We are invited up for prayer for these issues. Yet when these things occur within the folds of leadership it is vigorously defended as a patently private affair. The folks out in the pews are expected, not unlike kids in the midst of a divorce, to just suck it up and trust that mom and dad know what they are doing. This actually has the effect of keeping those of us who do not take to the stage in a state of immaturity, which is, incidentally, one of the cardinal sins that are railed against quite regularly from that same stage. It is time for leadership to step off from their podium of power and prestige, and get dirty with the rest of us. It is time for them to stop being so terrified of messes that happen as Christians mature. Attempting to keep us in diapers to contain the shit that happens is only causing a serious case of cheek rash that will hinder our ability to sit on even the most lavishly cushioned pew (or chair). When a person gets up with a nasty rash, and no Penaten® on hand, they will go home, or go to another leader who has some Penaten®, or perhaps start a group for others suffering from the same pain in the ass. Any way you slice it it doesn't come out pretty.
On the second point I have to say that institutionalized, infantile Christians are in serious need of having their butts kicked. They need to be weaned off of the bottles they clutch, like Sunday morning services for example, and start chewing on some real meat. Not just another "really good message", mind you. That kind of meat just sits in their under exercised colons, and causes those bloated expressions preachers get so tired of. Sunday morning is the Valium® of the diaper clad Christian masses. They get into an absolute tizzy if you threaten to change it, and will cry themselves into a coma if you ask them to take some responsibility for it. The biggest reason that they get so worked up about the crap that happens with leadership is that they have no idea who will change their diaper and burp them after the service. I think that is why pastors all over North America pat you on the back as they shake your hand at the door.
The meat Paul was referring to is not just some real tasty doctrine that we discuss with a practiced steak knife. The meat he was talking about was the protein packed food that will build muscle mass as the muscles are exercised.
At this point I will admit my own tendency to act like an institutionalized Christian, and my lack of desire to fight it for so many years. Fortunately I consider myself to be in recovery, and the rash is beginning to fade along with the pudgy thighs. Much of this has come from leaders who could not have been happy to just stand behind a pulpit week after week. They actually got down in the dirt with me. They actually let me grab hold of the tools, and start doing it myself. In fact their cheerfully turned away my requests for intervention, instead allowing me to figure it out.
The Sunday mornings I attend now feel very awkward, because with the rash disappearing I can finally think straight for myself. The way Sunday mornings are presented (North American a la carte) hold no interest for me at all any more, but thankfully there are leaders around who are willing to offer something very different. It is a savory dish, mostly because it is enjoyed just before going back to work where it will produce more muscle, and supply energy for the tasks at hand.
Hopefully you noticed that although the former rant about leaders did not end on so cheery a note as the latter about pew holders, the latter showed the relationship that is necessary to revitalize the church. Leaders who will get dirty in the trenches, elbow to elbow with the people they are leading. Not Sunday morning trenches either! The real ones we all slog through Monday to Saturday. Leaders who are not afraid of their charges maturing. Leaders who are not afraid to hand over the tools necessary for the work that is to be done. It is also about disciples who will kick off the diapers and get going for a change. Disciples who will grow up to become leaders in their own right. Disciples who are willing to yank the Sunday morning intravenous milk tube, and brave the withdrawals. Disciples who will actually do what their leaders have been teaching them instead of just discussing it over coffee to determine how 'biblical' it was.

Whew! I think that is it for now. If the next podcast has the same BS quotient as the one I listened to tonight I may just have to go at it again. Till then, may God bless your diapers off, and give you a hand down the stage stairs.


~~ said...

Wow! Good vent! :) Nothing like saying what so many others are just THINKING! :) Miss ya!

Canwdn said...

You've read my mind, cousin. I couldn't agree more.

diana said...

yikes! brad.... i wrote this beautiful retort and then had to get an account! stoopid! o wll- have to go for now, but will deffinately return to this one-
i love you guys!!!

diana said...

so - i said i would get back- and i have-but! i have also had time toreally consider your words and my own RBS that stings me considerably within the confines of going to church every week, practicing some sort of religion and then going home to a husband that doesnt believe in the ONE who fills my life with purpose and love- and ususally Joy if i let HIM.
the church leaders are doing what they can, i suppose, in the place they are--my question? why are they there? in leadership--are they leading us closer to the Truth of worship in daily life? are they leading us to the heart of Jesus? some are. and what am i doing? am i leading others to the heart of Jesus so they may walk in worship? or am i just going back and forth between Truth and the deception of this world? is my dance really just a two step?
You are deffinately causing me to re-think ---again--in this mess i call my church home and family. what is the responsibility of church to me? or me to the church? if this is my family, what am i doing to improve their life here, and/or forever?

Brad the Dad said...

Thanks one and all. I have really been thinking through what I wrote, and what it truly means for me. It seems that when I get this upset there is usually something that I see in myself that it actually touches off. I so want to be de-institutionalized.